Naruto: Nexus

Where the world of roleplay meets a new kind of system.
 
HomePortalCalendarFAQSearchMemberlistUsergroupsRegisterLog in
` Welcome :

"Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live."

Welcome to NarutoNexus, a friendly and active community ready to embrace your creativity in a free form Role Playing experience. Feel free to join and experience it for yourself.
` News :

Insert site news here.
` Mods :

~Fox~
WTFlash
Alex
Z
` Member of the Month :



K I R A
Because you're you.
` Character of the Month :



C H A R A C T E R
Testing!
` Mission of the Month :



KILL PARIS HILTON!
Why not?
` Battle Phrase of the Month :



"IMMA CHARGIN' MAH LASER"
:)
` Quote of the Month :



INSERT LEGIT QUOTE.
:)
` Credits :

Forum© Forumotion.com.
Site Theme© Respective owner/s.
Site Layout© Administrators.
Site Ideas© Administrators.
Sidebar Creation© Administrators.
Characters and Posts© Respective owner/s.
Naruto© Masashi Kishimoto

Any posts, ideas and suggestions from this site are copyrighted to the respective owners. No information may be taken without permission.

Share | 
 

 The Metaru Clan

Go down 
AuthorMessage
Jiro



Posts : 11
Join date : 2009-11-15

PostSubject: The Metaru Clan   Mon Nov 16, 2009 11:49 am

Name: The Metaru Clan

Village: Ame and to lesser extent Iron

Special Traits:

Wealthy: This does not mean much in a life or death struggle but its give the clan more clout then it otherwise would and ensures its members are well equipped for the task at hand

Contacts in Iron: Some its members travelled to Iron instead of Grass and set up shop there. With the financial support of the clan leadership in Grass they have become successful mine and forge owners with considerable influence in the country. The Metaru Clan are well informed about movements there, are treated warmly and have access to the quality goods the Iron Country provides.

Finally all Metaru Clan members who have ESMM tend to resemble in personality the metal which they manipulate. The often come across as pitiless, remorseless and unyielding, especially in battle. They a hard men and women all, prone to showing few emotions and tend to be dedicated to their roles. This is because strong magnetic influences on the limbic system in the brain serve to numb their emotional responses causing them to appear less ethical, even heartless and often cold to a causal observer. Ironically most Metaru Clan members are innately kind individuals but like the Aburames of Konoha they struggle to show their true nature behind the hard countenance. This should not be confused with arrogance which is a trait which is ironically very rare, an odd thing given their small size in comparison to their wealth and influence

Kekkei Genkai: ESMM (aka) Iron Sand – Iron Sand users possesses the ability of Electro Static Magnetic Manipulation or more commonly dubbed as the Iron Sand Kekkai Genkai in honour it’s of most famous technique. What this means is a user is able to produce an adaptable magnetic resonance simply through charka manipulation and concentration or in short he can warp, twist and otherwise manipulate metal in ways other people can only dream of. The affect of this Kekkai Genkai is myriad providing Hiero with a number of unusual traits and access to a considerable amount of unique linked Jutsu. Unless stated the traits cost no chakra in themselves to maintain. In reality Iron Sand places a substantial drain on the Iron Sand users however much like a Nin who trains every day with weights the constant strain on the system leads to Iron Sand users building up particularly potent reserves. This serves to negate the drain of using its passive abilities but does not serve to give Iron Sand Users more Chakra to freely use. Most of the Jutsu require no hand seals to perform, the metal moving by force of will rather then as a result of complicated seal usage. Most offensive moves cost additional chakra and require the user to move an outstretched arm in the manner and direction he wishes the technique to move (not dissimilar to Gaara’s sand or Magneto). Techniques require not only great concentration but they tend to use up one hand meaning all but the most basic Jutsu that can be performed with one handed seals or none can be used concurrently. Most users for this reason will never perform a Jutsu at same time as actively using ESMM

Those with this ability are noted for having pupiless iris the colour of liquid silver. This is a purely aesthetic difference and has no effect on their vision. It is believe to by cause by mild but non harmful absorption of metal over a sustained period into the blood stream. It usually starts developing around puberty with a silver sheen and slowly but surely the silver with become more opaque till the original colour and iris completely disappear. Hiero, ESMM most famous user, considers this more of a disadvantage then a advantage since those familiar with the colouring can instantly recognise them as members of the Metaru clan and he frequently henges his eyes as a result.

Name: Magnetic Aura
Rank: N/A
Type: Passive Trait (Active at all times)
Element: N/A
Description: All Iron Sand users exhibit a spherical magnetic aura with the user at the centre, the size and strength of which is directly comparable to the strength (Rank) of the user. Any magnetic Jutsu that goes beyond this aura counts as a rank up to reflect the difficulty to control metal outside the aura.
C Rank – 10 m radius
B Rank – 20 m radius
A Rank – 35 m radius
S Rank – 50 m radius

Name: Metal Sense
Rank: D
Type: Passive Trait (Active at all times)
Element: N/A
Description: Within their magnetic aura an Iron sand user can sense all metal objects from swords to bobby pins, feeling them react to the aura they project. The object needn’t be in plain sight to be felt.

Secret Clan Jutsu:

Spoiler:
 


History: The Metaru Clan is a very recent arrival to Grass in the scheme of things. Iron Sand user was its first officially recognised clan Leader. The Metaru were original a family of civilian Blacksmiths who lived in villages along the on the Iwa and Grass border. Technically they were part of Iwa but at this point in time few villages truly controlled as much land as they claimed on map and the Iwa Nin did not patrol this far nor too did Ame forces. Caught in a no mans land between the two factions the region embroiled several bloody wars and frequently taken advantage of by raiders and slavers. The Metaru were one of many families who choose to emigrate to safer lands. Over the generations they had developed a deep distrust of both Iwa and Grass under whom they had suffered great hardship and so the Metaru were one of a few families to travel to the Rain Country. Being weapon smiths of some skill the Metaru’s travelled all the way to Ame village where they would be ensured a good demand for their goods and services, though many travelled on to Iron to take advantage of countries famous ore reserves

For many years the remained humble blacksmiths and traders till Iron Sand user’s strange behaviour was finally revealed to be a new Kekkai Genkai. The prominence of the family grew with Iron Sand user till eventually it was offered a clan seat on the council. Ever since the Metaru Clan have come a prominent element of Ame society and is wealthy beyond measure thanks to its ties to iron, its extensive trade contracts, mining rights and the iron sand users ability to mine precious metal with astonishing ease. That said they are relatively small and many considered their increasingly influential clan to be nothing more then jumped up newcomers though few day say so openly. Compared to the greater clans of Ame they are still very small indeed and have only a 50 or so members including children and the elderly

The Metaru clan is somewhat feared in Ame as a result of the actions of most infamous member, Hiero Metaru. Few have forgotten his actions in dealing with the those have defied the Kage, how he brought down a building 40 stories tall to kill just 10 rebels without a blink of an eye. The natural affinty for metal worries many who live in the shadow of Ames towering metal towers. The Metaru are often considered as cold and unbending as the material manipulate.

Clan Symbol:



Last edited by Jiro on Tue Nov 17, 2009 4:47 pm; edited 11 times in total
Back to top Go down
View user profile
WTFlash



Posts : 82
Join date : 2009-10-28

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Mon Nov 16, 2009 12:52 pm

Haha, here we go. Now we are talkin!

There are a few things that need to be changed fundamentally first. A clan like this has alot of potential to be bad ass, so please be patient.

Iron Sand was, from my knowledge, a technique forged form the third Kazekage after studying the sand based techniques of the one tailed beast. It is for this reason, that I believe the ability to use 'Iron Sand' is a technique reserved for 'S' rank. (but naturally unlocks a butt load of lower ranked techniques). This is arguable, and will be discussed, however. But when you figure, that millions of billions of individual grain of metal must be molded via chakra as an external medium and manipulated. This would take extensive chakra control and chakra capacity, not to mention mastery of magnetism tech.

With that said, manipulating whole metal objects, like a kunai, shuriken, etc., is very possible, childs play even. One of the variables in the techniques should be how many metal objects can be manipulated at once... for example manipulation of ten shuriken as opposed to manipulation of 100000000000 grands of iron. I believe implementing a system like this per rank would help.

I like the magnetic aura and many of the tech that go along with it, but handsignless techniques, or techniques that can be performed 'at will' will most likely require 'A' rank or higher.

All techniques that involve manipulation outside of human capacity require chakra. Even if you can control magnetism, chakra is needed to power that ability. If your power is a toy, chakra is the battery.

Alot of weight variables are used here; expect them to be scaled at some point. I ask myself "would Hage' allow a genin to running about tossing 500lbs of metal at people?" and for some reason the answer is a slow forlorn shake of the head no. lol

Telekineses - I dont like psychic-esk forces (as you can see with me giving the 'Aoki' clan such a hard time). My first thought tells me that magnetism would grant the ability to push and pull on metal objects...but the way you describe manipulating the electro magnetic fields has some validity to it. I will go into how to make it legit more in detail after you have taken what I have already said into account.

Alot of your techniques don't have a rank, and as far as I know, techniques can't be rankless (even though you made the 'C' ranked exception). Do expect for some of the ranks to be changed, however.

First, there is a big difference between metal manipulation and magnetism. I was looking at the metal clone technique, which normally wouldn't work unless you could manipulate metal.

Also, alot of the techniques address a single character using it... please edit them for more universal use, if you are going to give access to multiple people that is.

And maybe this is just the bias of the kage, but this wouldn't be a bad clan in Amegakure.. seeing as though most if not all of the buildings are metal... lol
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Jiro



Posts : 11
Join date : 2009-11-15

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Mon Nov 16, 2009 2:26 pm

Thanks for getting back so quickly Flash. Here are my replies and changes on all the above issues:

Quote :
Iron Sand was, from my knowledge, a technique forged form the third Kazekage after studying the sand based techniques of the one tailed beast. It is for this reason, that I believe the ability to use 'Iron Sand' is a technique reserved for 'S' rank. (but naturally unlocks a butt load of lower ranked techniques). This is arguable, and will be discussed, however. But when you figure, that millions of billions of individual grain of metal must be molded via chakra as an external medium and manipulated. This would take extensive chakra control and chakra capacity, not to mention mastery of magnetism tech.

While you certainly correct about the cannon origins theres no indication the Kazekage didn’t learn to wield Iron Sand before he was S Rank and is in fact an A Rank ability. The reason I have gone with A Rank as the starting point for Iron sand manipulation are twofold:

1) The hardest part of using iron sand is ironically creating in the first place requiring a high level of control and concentration. That said its not at the level I believe your think of. After all you sound need to mold untold millions of grains individually, much creating regular sand all you need do is grind the metal fragments/peices against one another reducing them to a sand like consistency. When you consider the pinnacle of chakra manipulation is the Rasengan (sorry to use this example, rasengan being corny and overused as it is, but it’s a solid one) which is A rank can you truly argue grinding metal in iron sand is even more difficult. Personally I think it would be simpler just that the action would require greater concentration
2) The practicalities of moving it are in fact easier. Manipulating the sand in battle is far easier then you might imagine. Far from telekinetically moving each particle individually all an iron sand user really does is creates magnetic forces within the aura that attract the metal this way and that. Ironically using magnetism to move metal manner you will find it just as easy to move a 500lb pile of iron sand as a 500lb block of metal. I don’t have either on hand but I am fairly sure if I head a giant magnet and the metal in iron fillings form and as lump I could quite easily prove it in reality let alone in the narutoverse. In hindsight I should have better explained this, sorry about that Flash

Quote :
With that said, manipulating whole metal objects, like a kunai, shuriken, etc., is very possible, childs play even. One of the variables in the techniques should be how many metal objects can be manipulated at once... for example manipulation of ten shuriken as opposed to manipulation of 100000000000 grands of iron. I believe implementing a system like this per rank would help.

I refer to my previous comments particularly (2). As I explain above I am not manipulating 10000000000s of grains as you say but rather magnetic forces. Yes its more difficult to give it a gaara like fluid nature reflected it’s a rank nature but its fundamental not as problematic as you may have thought. As for quantifying numbers I completely understand where you are coming from its make perfect sense to know the scale of an attack. I even tried it before posting however when I tried to it turned out to be very messy. That’s why the weights are there as a guideline, its not only much easier to use weight as a limiting factor but its much simpler and easier to comprehend from opponents view what I am doing if I am sending a tonne of iron sand instead of 100000000 grains of it.

Quote :
I like the magnetic aura and many of the tech that go along with it, but handiness techniques, or techniques that can be performed 'at will' will most likely require 'A' rank or higher.

Thanks for the comments, I appreciate the feedback. As for the handiness nature of the techs I can change it if you like. I was simply going on the gaara basis and its clit’s he never needs hand signs in all but a rare few of his sand techs. I didn’t think it would be an issue since it’s really more meant for its visual appeal rather then its practical nature that said I understand your concerns. Would you like me to change it? Just state so and it will be done

Quote :
All techniques that involve manipulation outside of human capacity require chakra. Even if you can control magnetism, chakra is needed to power that ability. If your power is a toy, chakra is the battery.

The reason I have techs/traits as I like to think of them such as metal sense and manipulation requiring no chakra is they are not really techniques in any normal sense. None of them are aggressive and all the actual jutsu require exactly the amount chakra their rank dictates. If I had to be a c ranks just to manipulate the metal prior to even using for any techs all my techs would cost more chakra then their effect reflects. For example if I were to create 20 shuriken from a lump of metal and send them shooting at my opponent using magnetism the effect is the same the same as someone else unsealing 20 shuriken and throwing them at me at great speed. The difference is I would have paid chakra just to form them in the first place before I have use them effectively doing no real damage. In essence I am happy to rank them but I am not sure its fair to charge me chakra to simply use my kkg when sharingan, Byukagan, aburame etc (the list go on) pay no price to continually use there’s. As stated each and every defensive and offensive jutsu costs the relative amount of chakra. The traits that currently don’t cost me anything are as follows:

Magnetic Aura: A Limitation and a good one at that. Made D- S Rank
Metallic Telekinesis (Renamed Magnetic Flight): Simply the ability to move stuff about and stop metal things in mid air. Have changed the name and explanation of how it works and applied a small cost to doing the latter. Made C-S rank
Magnetic Manipulation: Given rank
Electro static charging is now a jutsu with a rank accordingly

Quote :
A lot of weight variables are used here; expect them to be scaled at some point. I ask myself "would Hage' allow a genin to running about tossing 500lbs of metal at people?" and for some reason the answer is a slow forlorn shake of the head no. lol

I had a lot of issues with this myself. I used numbers originally but it doesn’t work when you could be using variously shaped items. Weight is for more understandable especially when applied to odd metal items and iron sand. As for 500lbs that is not as much as you think about the weight of a really big man or scrawny gorilla. Metal wise that is far less. Given that are many C Rank techs capable of considerable damage such as Daitoppa - Great Breakthrough about you must ask yourself if moving 500lbs of metal at C rank is truly too much. Bare in mind your average car weighs about 3000lb (what a A rank user can move at speed in one go) and you begin to understand the feat isn’t truly as impressive as you might imagine. Considering there are Nin out there capable of hurling house size boulders I am not sure its all that unreasonable. I will like you to know your opinion. When you consider the weight of sand gaara must have used to do Sabaku Taisou - Desert Imperial Funeral, probably 10 tonnes or so you begin to see why the weights might some more reasonable then first thought

Quote :
Telekineses - I don’t like psychic-esk forces (as you can see with me giving the 'Aoki' clan such a hard time). My first thought tells me that magnetism would grant the ability to push and pull on metal objects...but the way you describe manipulating the electro magnetic fields has some validity to it. I will go into how to make it legit more in detail after you have taken what I have already said into account

My bad telekinesis is bad word to describe what an Iron user actually does. He certainly doesn’t leviatate individual items be force of will. I have edited this accordingly

Quote :
Alot of your techniques don't have a rank, and as far as I know, techniques can't be rankless (even though you made the 'C' ranked exception). Do expect for some of the ranks to be changed, however.

I have ranked the traits, though I should mention as I did earlier the aren’t techniques in any normal sense more kkg linked special abilities which is why they werent ranked before

Quote :
First, there is a big difference between metal manipulation and magnetism. I was looking at the metal clone technique, which normally wouldn't work unless you could manipulate metal.

I could rewrite it if you like, I admit to use the terms rather interchangeably for lack of better words. I just thought metal clones were a nice spin on a classic tech

Quote :
Also, alot of the techniques address a single character using it... please edit them for more universal use, if you are going to give access to multiple people that is.

That’s just pure laziness on my part and has been changed. That said I am probably going to be quite restrictive on who I allow to use the clan given the work put into it

Quote :
And maybe this is just the bias of the kage, but this wouldn't be a bad clan in Amegakure.. seeing as though most if not all of the buildings are metal... lol

Well to b fair the village bits certainly in question and he may yet be made Ame. I put down grass simply because I quite like the colour but I havent given the subject very much thought yet


Last edited by Jiro on Mon Nov 16, 2009 2:53 pm; edited 2 times in total
Back to top Go down
View user profile
WTFlash



Posts : 82
Join date : 2009-10-28

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Mon Nov 16, 2009 2:34 pm

Those were all just my first thoughts, I will get down to the individual abilities and jutsu in about.. 30mins when Im out of anthropology... haha. I'll edit here when I have done so.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
WTFlash



Posts : 82
Join date : 2009-10-28

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Mon Nov 16, 2009 11:59 pm

As far as ranking, I would like to think that the rank of the jutsu doesn't have to reflect how much chakra is used. Like... Taijutsu, Kenjutsu, etc., techniques that done use chakra at all, still have a rank. Beyond chakra control, there are elements including how dangerous, useful, adaptable, etc., that reflect in the rank. Most commonly its decided by what rank someone has to be in order to master it... As - D- rank, Genin - C-rank, etc, Chunnin - B-rank etc., But yes, any ability that takes some sort of manipulation will require chakra. And from what I understand, the sharigan, byakugan, and even Aburame's bugs have some kind of chakra exchange for their ability.

And for the Iron Sand, your description there checks out. I can dig it! lol... now for the arduous part.

Magnetic Aura -- C-S rank, though, is it a passive or do you activate it at some point? For simplicity, make Metal Sense and Metallic Vibration their own jutsu, and just refer to the Magnetic Aura. I know it may seem pointless, but when referring to it later it will be alot easier. You are also going to have to remove the distance clause about things being free... etc.,

Magnetic Flight -- Hmm... I'll look into the weight limits, besides that, please remove the 'free of chakra' clause and it should be good.

Metal Manipulation -- With the exception of 'Metal Sand' molding metal will be impossible with just magnetism... the exception of like, aluminum foil, something readily mold-able. Now bending it about would be possible, but crafting a blade from metal, as I assume to be one of the possibilities, isn't actively possible with just magnetism. (going back to the idea that you would need metal manipulation tech or something similar for that)

I'll look into the stuff in the spoilers after the basics are straighten out! Though it should get easier from there, haha.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Jiro



Posts : 11
Join date : 2009-11-15

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Tue Nov 17, 2009 7:31 am

Magnetic Aura changed as requested. It is passive and always active as is the metal sense which is a seperate passive trait

Magnetic Vibrations is now a jutsu. Has changed a fair bit and now has chakra costs attached

Magnetic Flight has changed a fair bit and now has chakra costs attached.

Metal manipulation has been removed altogether since you agrument is pretty sound though Iron sand manipulation has been added as a A Rank Jutsu

After further thought I have also decided to go with Ame since its more in keeping.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
WTFlash



Posts : 82
Join date : 2009-10-28

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Tue Nov 17, 2009 1:27 pm

Metal Clone -- The Metal Clone will have to be removed for the same reason that the Magnet Manipulation was, unless the clone was made of the iron sand in which case it would be an 'A' ranked clone.

Electrical Phantasm -- This would be an 'A' ranked technique in that I can't see a genin nor chunnin alone learning it. It involves very particular ideals that not only targets minute amounts of metal in the body, but then interacts with minute electrically charged electrons that have been manually charged to interact with the metal in the body to cause a noticeable effect on the user. It would also need some sort of visual? Maybe the electrons appear as sparks of lightning or something like that, otherwise it is an undodgeable sort of attack.

Infinite Ore Extraction -- This technique is also 'A' ranked for the exact same reason. To extract enough ore by churning the earth and pulling it forth with magnetic force is more then a stretch for genin or chunnin and would require alot of chakra as well, at least to get anything significant.

Iron Shark technique -- As stated earlier, if made with Iron Sand it is possible to make elaborate shark figures like this, but they cannot be carved out of a chunk of metal. Im down for the idea of them being made of random scrap metal to form a junkyard looking shark, but keep in mind that is it situational and without metal you cannot mold metal into specific shapes with magnetism alone.

Iron Skin -- It fundamentally needs chakra to be activated... It says that it would increase yours strength, which I can't see it doing that. It would also need chakra to maintain, as having a moldable iron skin would otherwise weight you down and hinder your motion unless there was chakra to interact with it and your body.

Iron Sand technique -- Hmm... change it so that it is D-rank to activate AND maintain, because if you are moving and interacting with these 'crude' metal objects then you are also doing so to the electro magnetic fields you create them with. These EMF will have to be maintained with a slight amount of chakra. Though, an 'A-ranked' shinobi probably wont feel the effect of losing a 'D' ranked amount.

Iron Sand Gathering Technique -- Please include a 'C' ranked amount of chakra needed to maintain these 'large magnetic fields'.

Iron Coffin -- Can all of this be done in the same post? It seems as if it is a multi-step kinda justu, so either classify it as 'S' ranked or define when actions take place.

Iron Bullet -- I'd say you could 'control it within the area of your magnetic aura, but once outside of that area you can no longer change its shape or trajectory.

Iron Sphere Jutsu -- The defense to 'S' ranked tech is.... iffy. Not because it wouldn't work, but by the standards i've seen enforce, 'S' ranked techniques are considered to be in a whole different league then the previous 'A' ranked technique, and traditionally only 'S' ranked defenses can stop 'S' ranked techniques. Perhaps you should make an 'S' ranked form, form that can withstand it. Do also understand that you are subject to any number of other effects. If the iron sand is melted it will most likely envelope you inside. I assume the metal is also under you, but you may want to include in the description that it covers you 360 degrees so that no one tries to take advantage of lack of detail and attacks from under you.

Haha, im excited to see a version of this clan done right... I just spent and hour reading and going over all this when I should be doing homework. FML.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Jiro



Posts : 11
Join date : 2009-11-15

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Tue Nov 17, 2009 4:48 pm

Quote :
Metal Clone -- The Metal Clone will have to be removed for the same reason that the Magnet Manipulation was, unless the clone was made of the iron sand in which case it would be an 'A' ranked clone.

Changed to a A Rank technique requiring Iron Sand. Given our previous discussions about metal manipulation its completely understandable why it would not logically work in its previous form

Quote :
Electrical Phantasm -- This would be an 'A' ranked technique in that I can't see a genin nor chunnin alone learning it. It involves very particular ideals that not only targets minute amounts of metal in the body, but then interacts with minute electrically charged electrons that have been manually charged to interact with the metal in the body to cause a noticeable effect on the user. It would also need some sort of visual? Maybe the electrons appear as sparks of lightning or something like that, otherwise it is an undodgeable sort of attack.

Changed considerably. I have made the attack simpler and allowed for relatively easy evasion, at least by skilled nin. Kept it at C Rank accordingly but will change it if you think its still too low given its new description

Quote :
Infinite Ore Extraction -- This technique is also 'A' ranked for the exact same reason. To extract enough ore by churning the earth and pulling it forth with magnetic force is more then a stretch for genin or chunnin and would require alot of chakra as well, at least to get anything significant.

Made A Rank and edited to better reflect this

Quote :
Iron Shark technique -- As stated earlier, if made with Iron Sand it is possible to make elaborate shark figures like this, but they cannot be carved out of a chunk of metal. Im down for the idea of them being made of random scrap metal to form a junkyard looking shark, but keep in mind that is it situational and without metal you cannot mold metal into specific shapes with magnetism alone.

Taken it into account as with metal clone I understand why we want to avoid metal manipulation in this case

Quote :
Iron Skin -- It fundamentally needs chakra to be activated... It says that it would increase yours strength, which I can't see it doing that. It would also need chakra to maintain, as having a moldable iron skin would otherwise weight you down and hinder your motion unless there was chakra to interact with it and your body.

Done

Quote :
Iron Sand technique -- Hmm... change it so that it is D-rank to activate AND maintain, because if you are moving and interacting with these 'crude' metal objects then you are also doing so to the electro magnetic fields you create them with. These EMF will have to be maintained with a slight amount of chakra. Though, an 'A-ranked' shinobi probably wont feel the effect of losing a 'D' ranked amount.

Done

Quote :
Iron Sand Gathering Technique -- Please include a 'C' ranked amount of chakra needed to maintain these 'large magnetic fields'.

Done

Quote :
Iron Coffin -- Can all of this be done in the same post? It seems as if it is a multi-step kinda justu, so either classify it as 'S' ranked or define when actions take place.

Simplified the actions to make it more inline with an A rank

Quote :
Iron Bullet -- I'd say you could 'control it within the area of your magnetic aura, but once outside of that area you can no longer change its shape or trajectory.

Done

Quote :
Iron Sphere Jutsu -- The defense to 'S' ranked tech is.... iffy. Not because it wouldn't work, but by the standards i've seen enforce, 'S' ranked techniques are considered to be in a whole different league then the previous 'A' ranked technique, and traditionally only 'S' ranked defenses can stop 'S' ranked techniques. Perhaps you should make an 'S' ranked form, form that can withstand it. Do also understand that you are subject to any number of other effects. If the iron sand is melted it will most likely envelope you inside. I assume the metal is also under you, but you may want to include in the description that it covers you 360 degrees so that no one tries to take advantage of lack of detail and attacks from under you.

Done

Quote :
Haha, im excited to see a version of this clan done right... I just spent and hour reading and going over all this when I should be doing homework. FML.

That makes two of us Smile
Back to top Go down
View user profile
WTFlash



Posts : 82
Join date : 2009-10-28

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Tue Nov 17, 2009 6:16 pm

alright, I'll take a final look at it after track... I'll edit here when I've done so.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
WTFlash



Posts : 82
Join date : 2009-10-28

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Tue Nov 17, 2009 8:02 pm

Okay! As far as I'm concerned, your good to go. BUT there are some things I want you to take into consideration just so we are on the same page...

First, any techniques that dont specifically state some other way of activating or use are assumed to have hand signs required.

Second, Because this form of magnetism deals with molding electro magnetic fields (or at least as I've come to understand it) lightning element chakra is going to be the main weakness of your character. Not only is metal considered a part of 'earth' and thus weak to lightnings piercing potential, but it will also disturb your control of these electromagnetic fields. Its kinda like a natural enemy, just as my Ice based Kage is at a major disadvantage against Fire based techniques. Something to keep in mind.

HOWEVER, this is some of the best work I've seen in awhile, and I thank you for being so patient through out this process. It's refreshing.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Jiro



Posts : 11
Join date : 2009-11-15

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Wed Nov 18, 2009 9:34 am

WTFlash wrote:
Okay! As far as I'm concerned, your good to go. BUT there are some things I want you to take into consideration just so we are on the same page...

First, any techniques that don’t specifically state some other way of activating or use are assumed to have hand signs required.

Understood. I will run through the techniques to make sure the ones that do not use hand signs are clearly defined as such later today

WTFlash wrote:
Second, Because this form of magnetism deals with molding electro magnetic fields (or at least as I've come to understand it) lightning element chakra is going to be the main weakness of your character. Not only is metal considered a part of 'earth' and thus weak to lightning’s piercing potential, but it will also disturb your control of these electromagnetic fields. Its kinda like a natural enemy, just as my Ice based Kage is at a major disadvantage against Fire based techniques. Something to keep in mind.


Wouldn't want it any other way. No clan should be without weakness especially a clan with such clear strengths in other department. Metal with is strong earth basis will always be vulnerable to lightning based abilities and that’s how it should be. Many a new rper believe that characters are defined by the strengths when truth be told its their weaknesses and how the cope with them that is the most defining aspect. After all if we didn’t have differing weaknesses how can we truly be individuals. My own charry will have ways to compensate and limit these issues as you might expect but this will not change the fact the ESMM is innately vulnerable to lightning based attacks

WTFlash wrote:
HOWEVER, this is some of the best work I've seen in awhile, and I thank you for being so patient through out this process. It's refreshing.

Thanks for the positive feedback. The experience has certainly being a mutual one and I have always appreciated your thoughts and opinions on the matter. You have displayed not only a good grasp for the fundamentals of magnetic control and helped define the difference between it and metal manipulation but also taken the time to understand the reasoning and concepts behind ESMM and its Jutsu and always given me an opportunity to put forward my case. The experience on the whole has been oddly uplifting, intellectually stimulating and entirely devoid of the tension that commonly arises in apps. Nexus will doubtless benefit from your sound judgment for some time to come. Keep up the good work Smile
Back to top Go down
View user profile
WTFlash



Posts : 82
Join date : 2009-10-28

PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   Wed Nov 18, 2009 12:00 pm

And with that said... consider it Approved.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: The Metaru Clan   

Back to top Go down
 
The Metaru Clan
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» Skaven Clan Pestilens Rat Ogre Question
» Clan Skryre
» Jackanory's WIP Clan Pestilens skaven, updated 29.11
» Skaven Clan Skryre
» Clan turney?

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Naruto: Nexus :: Creation Center :: Accepted Clans-
Jump to: